Why do you watch "Hoarders"?

Unclutterer ForumsUncluttering and Organizing in the MediaHoarders on A&E -- Season 2

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Started 2 years ago by zchristy
Latest reply from Conny
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chacha1
Member

It seems especially tragic when there is a mutually enabling couple at the heart of things. I've seen two basic subsets of Hoarders shows (and actually don't think I've watched at all since this discussion started): The older adult whose spouse has either died or left, and whose children are trying to save the hoarder from imminent eviction (or, in one case, jail time); and the couple whose children still live at home but are imminently being taken away by CPS.

When it's a single, older person you can at least make the argument that they're not hurting anyone but themselves. When it's a couple with adolescents in the house, usually one adult goes into the show claiming the other person is the problem but very shortly it becomes clear that they are both equally complicit.

And they blame EVERYONE but themselves - they NEVER voluntarily seek help.

Sorry about your friend lucy1965. You were wise not to bring them into your home.

Posted 5 months ago #
lucy1965
Member

Not wanting to derail this, but -- thank you, chacha. I took a lot of flack from people on another forum who only knew them on-line: they'd never been in their home, never smelled it, never walked on a thin layer of things through waist-high piles to get to the bathroom. As much as I loved my friend -- and I did love her -- I was married and had a child and they had the right not to have their lives disrupted.

Okay, done now. Who wants to meet me in another thread and talk about Christmas? *weary grin*

Posted 5 months ago #
bandicoot
Member

lucy, i am sorry about your friend.
what a thing to deal with, and how unfair of them to expect your home to be their solution.

i haven't watched hoarders in a long time, but i was fascinated by it.
i am fascinated by the other end of the spectrum too: buddhist monks living with only their robes, sandals, and a begging bowl.
all these degrees of attachment and detachment, perceptions of scarcity and plenty.....very interesting to ponder.

i did dislike the synthezised pressures and deadlines in the hoarders show.
i prefer less hand-wringing and more " this is how we are solving this".

Posted 5 months ago #
chacha1
Member

about the deadlines ... as noted I only watched a few shows, but the ones that I saw all had imminent REAL deadlines re: city or county official action, generally to remove the person from the home. Not sure how the show's production schedule ran but it is possible they calendared their production to coincide with the deadlines - although that seems awfully cynical, even for TV.

I am by no means an expert on the ways and means of U.S. government agencies but my impression is that it takes a looooooong time to reach a point of action and then there is no stopping it. I would actually not be surprised if some government deadlines have been *extended* to accommodate the production of the show(s). I'm pretty certain that was the case for at least one show I caught, about an older man, living in a true junkyard, whose obsession was stuck at the "value" of the junk, that he wanted to sell to benefit his grandkids.

but per lucy ... what about christmas?! I have discovered I am a Christmas hoarder! Grinch that I am, I barely give anyone gifts, and yet I have a box of gift-wrappy stuff in my coat closet. I do believe I am going to put it out in the hallway with a FREE sticker on it.

Posted 5 months ago #
Ella
Member

I don't watch TV, but I checked out the DVD of the first season of "Hoarders" from the library, and watched it with a mixture of horror and sadness. That was when I first joined this forum a year ago, and I was also reading a lot of decluttering books and catching up in the archives of many blogs. All this for the purpose of seeing where I was on the cluttering/hoarding spectrum (thankfully, not in the danger zone).

I have the same criticisms of the show that everyone else has cited... the rapid-fire editing, high drama, sensationalism, insensitivity of the facilitators, and the often superficial bandaid clean-up. But altogether it helped me understand a bit better how people become hoarders and get stuck there.

The other day I came across this insightful blog entry about ADD, clutter, hoarding, and being "chronically disorganized":

http://arianebenefit.com/blog/2011/10/19/truth-about-chronic-disorganization-understanding-what-causes-chronic-disorganization-and-how-to-heal-the-trauma-of-lifelong-disorganization-overwhelm-and-frustration/

Posted 5 months ago #
Rosa
Member

chacha, I think in a lot of cases, the authorities are really loathe to move in and do anything because it really strains their resources. There are starting to be hoarding task forces in some counties, but a lot of the hoarder shows seem to happen in places where that's not true (which makes sense - if there was other help, people would go there instead.)

When they're looking at condeming a house for squalor, the county or city is looking at a HUGE expense. I would guess in many cases they would work with the TV production crew on scheduling just to avoid having to pay for cleanup themselves. Lots of the houses shown are hazmat sites.

I do wish there were more legit "turnaround" shows, but I think you have to start with a less-advanced case and then the visuals aren't as arresting. But it HAS to be manageable, especially in less extreme cases - in a lot of the cases shown, the person DID manage it for years or even decades before the person helping them or keeping them in check died or left.

Posted 5 months ago #
Conny
Member

I watched "my mother's garden" last night and i can feel empathy for all sides.
My mum was not a hoarder, but she did pass on stuff to me that she had picked up "on the way" and decided it "was just right" for me and when i moved away she would spend enormous amounts of money mailing me "stuff".
I see how i could have inherited or learned some of this behaviour and this website, and a few others keep/kept me sane(r), help me re-learn or unlearn, not sure what term would apply best.
There is a new programme on German TV similar to Hoarders (watched a few episodes on YouTube) and my husband asked me: "why do you watch that?" my immediate response was: "to remind myself not to ever get that way, that bad".
Plus it is a reminder also to stop looking at objects and think: "This could be useful for...." the way i used to do, thinking i was being frugal.

Posted 5 months ago #

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