Barbie Collection

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Started 1 year ago by charmed2482
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charmed2482
Member

I have this barbie collection that I left in my brothers basement all packed into large totes, 9 of them to be exact in October of 2008 when I moved away to be with my boyfriend. There isn't room for them in our small apartment, and I originally thought I would get them back whenever we decide to buy a house. But I don't think I want any of it anymore.

The problem is I think my mom is more attached to this stuff than I am, she's attached to everything. I knew I would never be able to just sell it without her finding out and if I just showed up and moved it all out of his basement she would want to know how I all of a sudden had space for it.

So I asked her how she felt about me selling all of it via Facebook messenger. She didn't know how to use the messenger and called me telling me "no". She wanted to know why I would want to get rid of it. I tried explaining to her that its going to be sitting down there for a long time if I don't do something about it. I hate the idea of it just sitting around for years when some kid could be getting enjoyment out of it like I did.

She thinks I should hold onto it till we get a house and I have a room just for all of my Barbie stuff where I can spread out my collection and look at it. I honestly just want to be rid of it, I'm not attached to it anymore and don't see a point it keeping any of it. I'm already giving the one Barbie I brought with me to a friend for her daughter.

If I had space I might keep the native American barbies since there are only 4, but those are the only ones I even want to keep a little bit.

I am working toward becoming minimalist and this is something I don't know how to explain to her and even if I did I am not sure she would understand because she is a pack-rat/borderline hoarder.

I was thinking I would just tell her she can buy it all from me for 20$ or that she can have it for free but I'm not sure. If my brother finds out it belongs to her and not me, he will eventually get tired of having her crap filling up his basement and tell her to get it out or he will trash it, and then when she fails to get it out of his basement he will just throw it out and I can't bear the thought of it all going in the trash either. I had a buying but if she's not going to let me just sell it all I might as well just give it to her. Plus its going to be hard enough trying to sell something three hours away from where I live now.

Not really sure what I should do about it. I don't want kids, so I don't have any reason to save it. I don't have any nieces either. I might having 5 brothers but 4 of them are 18 or under, so hopefully not any time soon.

I'm afraid if I just sell it or give it to her that it's still going to bother me.

Posted 1 year ago #
badkitti
Member

Can you way up how upset your mother will be if you sell them vs lugging them around in the future? Will she be upset, and then get over it? If she will be too upset is her house over crowded and cluttered? If not, just tell her she takes them with her. If not, hmmm, that's the tricky bit isn't it. Could you sell them on ebay instead of giving away?

Posted 1 year ago #
charmed2482
Member

Selling on E-bay isn't really an option. there's just to much. I have a barbie dream house and all the furniture

http://media.nowpublic.net/images//91/5/9157b74982a5d3c20d3eefb81848a954.jpg

it looks like this one but its pink and not yellow. plus i have another beach house, and several barbie cars. lots of barbies and other barbie stuff. all this stuff is in 9 very large totes. I can't exactly remember the size of the totes, but they are the biggest ones you can buy at a Target or Wal-mart. I got mine at Farm N Fleet i think.

http://www.farmandfleet.com/products/234645-roughneck_jumbo_storage_box.html?lref=%2fcatalog%2ffind.aspx%3ft%3dtotes

I think these are the totes I got

only one of them has none barbie stuff in it, and there are some large pink panther stuffed animals I don't really want it too.

I don't know if she would ever get over it, she still talks about stuff we lost in a fire in 1994. and her house is stuffed. Its gotten better with her current boyfriend but there is no room for any of the barbie stuff which is why its in my brothers basement and not hers.

Posted 1 year ago #
charmed2482
Member

I had to make several trips to my brother house with my car and my friends van b/c all the totes would not fit in both vehicles. Some of the totes are a little different b/c I already had some and had to purchase three of those jumbo ones for the house sections to the dream house and just packed all the smaller stuff in around it.

Posted 1 year ago #
Suebie
Member

If I were in the same situation I would tell my mom that I am getting rid of it (either by donation or selling it) and to please take whatever she wants from it before I get rid of it by a certain date.

I would then consider putting everything she doesn't take on Craigslist and selling it all at once. If no one buys it, then I would either donate it or have a super Barbie garage sale in the summer.

That is what I would do if I were in your shoes.

Good luck, I understand how hard it can be when a mom is more attached to things than you and they belong to you. It's hard.

Posted 1 year ago #
javamonster
Member

Charmed 2482, I guess I'm not understanding how your mother is involved with knowing what's in your brother's basement, or when you would be taking it out or how she could possibly know (telepathically? with spies?) if you have space or not in your apartment. I read that you removed all the packages that held them.

Getting rid of it--I wouldn't even tell her what happened to it. It's not *her* stuff.

Posted 1 year ago #
Sky
Member

It is your stuff to do with as you please. Out of kindness to your mother, ask if there is one or two she would want for old times sake. Then sell or give them to someone to enjoy.

I am told all the time that I am going to regret getting rid of so much stuff. I don't miss any of it. It is so freeing to let it go. Please live your life as you choose to and make no apologizes for it.

Posted 1 year ago #
Mrs.Mack
Member

If you really don't want it, you won't regret getting rid of it. Really.

These are your things, not hers. They're not even stored in her house. You don't need her permission to get rid of them, and you're not obligated to keep them just to make her happy. Nor are you responsible for her attachment to your things. That is her issue that she needs to learn to deal with.

If you'd like, you can offer to let her keep a few while you get rid of the rest, but based on what you've said it sounds like she already has too much stuff... So I'd get rid of it (selling or donating) without offering her any. But if you choose to let her keep some, give her a maximum she's allowed to keep (like 3 dolls) or she'll try to keep them all. Be firm if she tries to keep more—don't give in.

The Barbie garage sale someone mentioned sounds like a fun idea. You could even have a Barbie party and give the dolls away as party favors or prizes.

Posted 1 year ago #
charmed2482
Member

her and my brother are really close, she drives him places(i don't think his car is functioning right now) and he's always at her house, so he would probably tell her. Its going to be a huge hassle getting them out of his basement and trying to sell it because of how much there is. It probably won't even happen until its really nice outside and I can spend a few days in town(i don't live there anymore).

I just think if I just get rid of them, she's going to be B*tching about it forever every single time I talk to her. I might be easier just letting her have all of it. I just feel like I am enabling her when I just give in. She also wants all my artwork from school if I decide to get rid of all of it. But I've gotten to the point where I just try not to care anymore because I know I can't change her and having other people tell her she has to much stuff never helped her one bit.

She was always big on encouraging me to have collections of stuff when I was younger and the barbie was one that a lot of money was spent on. She started talking about how she remembered when I got the doll house, because my dad didn't want me to get it. He sent me 100$ for Christmas told me i could spend it on whatever I wanted and then told my mom not to let me buy a barbie house when he found out that's what I wanted b/c it cost 120$ at the time. then went on about how she doesn't think they even sell them anymore. I don't even care its just crap sitting in totes in my brothers basement. All I could say was that its going to be sitting there forever.

she started asking if me and my boyfriend were having problems b/c I said it would probably be a long time before we bought a house. I don't even care if we ever own a house, its not even a priority to me at all.

Posted 1 year ago #
javamonster
Member

You know, provided everything is great shape (not dirty or mangled or hair cut) what about taking all the Barbie stuff to a battered women's shelter or homeless shelter in your area? Children often don't have a chance to take their toys with them, and believe me, the kids there would appreciate them greatly.

From what you just wrote, it sounds like your mother and you have boundry problems. Now is a great time to draw those boundries. You could use my suggestion and guilt her about it--"What, mom, you want to take away some kid's happiness who has little?"

Posted 1 year ago #
charmed2482
Member

That's a really good idea, I'll have to see if they have something like that in either my town her hers. I think we do have boundary issues. she things she can tell me what I can and can't do with my stuff. I would rather donate than sell it.

Posted 1 year ago #
Mrs.Mack
Member

If not a shelter, maybe a pre-school/elementary school, or a day care center.

You and your mom clearly have issues beyond the stuff that you want to get rid of and she wants to keep. Have you considered talking to a therapist or family counselor together?

Posted 1 year ago #
charmed2482
Member

Honestly if I thought it would help I might, but she's incredibly stubborn. Also neither of us can really afford that kind of thing and living three hours apart would make it really hard. I know it sounds like I am just making excuses, but for the most part I've just given up trying to help her at all. If it wasn't for her boyfriend she could probably be on Hoarders. I just don't talk to her that much because usually when I do she says something that makes me mad or tries to imply I should do something her way. For the most part I don't let it bother me anymore. She's always giving me crap about the fact that I don't want kids and I just keep repeating myself and not letting it brother me. I'm sure I have issues with both my parents but I've actually come a long way since I realized I would like to be more minimalist and made that decision for myself and am trying not to let her opinion or anyone Else's opinion of that change my mind.

Having so much stuff is such a distraction.

Posted 1 year ago #
Sky
Member

charmed2482....You can't change another person you can only change yourself. I fully agree on setting boundaries in any relationship. I like what Dr. Phil says, "you teach people how to treat you". We all have the right to live our lives the way we want to. I don't know how old you are but after we are grown and on our own parents don't have the right to tell us how to live. I know 60 year olds that are miserable because they let parents and others influence their lifestyle and never accomplished their goals. Sad.
When my parents would start on my brother and me I would tell him to pack his bags, we were going on a guilt trip!

Posted 1 year ago #
avick679
Member

Hi, I came across this blog when I googled barbie collections, I don't have anything to say about decluttering or relationships. I just want to know if Charmed2482 still has barbies. I am looking for cheap Christmas and birthday presents for my 9 year old daughter. I am interested in what you have and if you would be willing to sell a portion or all Email me avick679@gmail.com

Posted 1 year ago #
misskittin
Member

It sounds like your collection may have significant value. Have you looked into having an ebay store sell your collection for you? You may have a friend with an ebay hobby who would be happy to do that for you. Take the profit and donate some to an animal shelter and pay for some housecleaning/organizing for your mom, or use the profit to take your mom out and have a fun experience like at a restaurant or movie or theater show. Turn this positive.

Posted 1 year ago #
terriok
Member

I took incredible care of my blond pony-tailed Barbie. I never combed her hair out because it would get ratty. My poor Ken doll went bald in some spots so I had to put a lil plastic on his head at night.

My sister stole my Barbie body. I am still mad about it. LOL.

My Mom must have tossed her pretty head.

Mom did throw out my shoebox full of my Beatles cards which would be worth a fortune. I'd only sell off the duplicates. And all that nasty gum I had to chew! Blech.

I have one thing from my childhood- a book my godfather gave me and I treasure it. Although he died quite young I nothing else like my Dad's heavy maroon coloured ring he and I always played with.

Sad.

Anyway I have a few Barbies- Katie Scarlette O'Hara, Erica Kane, Tippi Hendren with birds on her head. (I wonder if there is a Norman Bates- LOL) And a Brazen Hussy teacher Barbie with no undies (manufacturer error). I taught but had a few more students in my class than Teacher Barbie has in hers. HA!

I would like a melon car but I have to stay away from Barbie and Beatles stuff. I might get carried away. I do need a Ken. Ha! I like the repos.

Oh and I have a doll of Grace O'Malley the Irish Pirate Queen that I am a descendant of (no foolin'). Grace took on the likes of Queen Elizabeth herself.

I sent a Grace doll to my 72 year old aunt. She was delighted.

I saw a Barbie go for $10,000 on Ebay. The lady worked in a bank and was helping herself to a lil cash from the vault. She bought in a frenzy.

With your collection you could head to any safe inner city park, make sure you have enough and pass them out to the kids. Then skedaddle as word will get out.

Or give them to a teacher. She can pass it on on the sly. Not every kid needs one. Some already have them. The kids understand.

Some of these kids have nothing, not even a single book. (But their parents all have money to watch wrestling on cable.)

That's why they would drive me nuts picking the trash. I would throw something out, the same junky thing 5x a day! I kept telling them that someone would get the good stuff.

I donated a bunch of Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boys books. I sell Nancy on Ebay and it's usually fun. Great presents! Cheap! ROFL.

But anyway the school staff wanted to put them in the library. I said no, that I wanted them to go to one 4th grade class and each kid would get a book to keep and they could trade. I gave extras so each kid had a good selection. (If they fight, they get nothing. That puts a stop to it real fast).

But I AM going to get rid of two ten pound encyclopedias I just found which I have not opened in a while. TODAY.

Posted 12 months ago #
charmed2482
Member

I still have the babies, but I decided to just leave them for now. I don't think its worth arguing with my mom over it and I know she'd be all devastated if i just got rid of it behind her back. Plus it would be a huge hassle right now since all of it is a three hour drive from where I currently live. someone mentioned how they don't have much from their childhood. The barbies are the main thing I have with a few other smaller things my mom has, i don't have much either and a lot of the barbie stuff came from when i was a little older, I got the house when I was 16. The reason I don't have much from when i was really little was b/c there was a house fire, and then another time we had all out toys in a storage unit(I can't remember if this was before or after the fire) b/c we didn't have solid living arrangements and the storage unit was robbed and all of out toys were stolen. I know it broke my mothers heart to have to break that news to us, we talked about those toys all the time and when we'd be able to get them back and she'd take us out there to switch out toys b/c we had limited space(i think we might have been living with my grandmother).

So I think that's why she's so attached, she knows i don't want kids, so there won't be anyone to pass them down too, unless one of my brothers has a little girl. I did give one of the ones i had with me to a friends daughter and she loved it(she had went through some bad stuff before my friend regained custody of her).

I just decided not fighting with my mom over it and not breaking her heart were more important than selling it off or giving it away. I'd rather just not see my mom sad over it. if one of my brothers gives me a niece I'm sure she'd have no problem with me passing it along.

Posted 12 months ago #

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