http://unclutterer.com/discuss/forum/hoarders-on-aampe-season-2 The community for people interested in home and office organizing. en-US Mon, 13 Feb 2012 22:56:30 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://unclutterer.com/discuss/search.php http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders/page/2#post-41285 Wed, 21 Dec 2011 18:12:50 +0000 Conny 41285@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>I watched "my mother's garden" last night and i can feel empathy for all sides.<br /> My mum was not a hoarder, but she did pass on stuff to me that she had picked up "on the way" and decided it "was just right" for me and when i moved away she would spend enormous amounts of money mailing me "stuff".<br /> I see how i could have inherited or learned some of this behaviour and this website, and a few others keep/kept me sane(r), help me re-learn or unlearn, not sure what term would apply best.<br /> There is a new programme on German TV similar to Hoarders (watched a few episodes on YouTube) and my husband asked me: "why do you watch that?" my immediate response was: "to remind myself not to ever get that way, that bad".<br /> Plus it is a reminder also to stop looking at objects and think: "This could be useful for...." the way i used to do, thinking i was being frugal. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders/page/2#post-41215 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 21:45:20 +0000 Rosa 41215@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>chacha, I think in a lot of cases, the authorities are really loathe to move in and do anything because it really strains their resources. There are starting to be hoarding task forces in some counties, but a lot of the hoarder shows seem to happen in places where that's not true (which makes sense - if there was other help, people would go there instead.)</p> <p>When they're looking at condeming a house for squalor, the county or city is looking at a HUGE expense. I would guess in many cases they would work with the TV production crew on scheduling just to avoid having to pay for cleanup themselves. Lots of the houses shown are hazmat sites.</p> <p>I do wish there were more legit "turnaround" shows, but I think you have to start with a less-advanced case and then the visuals aren't as arresting. But it HAS to be manageable, especially in less extreme cases - in a lot of the cases shown, the person DID manage it for years or even decades before the person helping them or keeping them in check died or left. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders/page/2#post-41210 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 20:58:12 +0000 Ella 41210@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>I don't watch TV, but I checked out the DVD of the first season of "Hoarders" from the library, and watched it with a mixture of horror and sadness. That was when I first joined this forum a year ago, and I was also reading a lot of decluttering books and catching up in the archives of many blogs. All this for the purpose of seeing where I was on the cluttering/hoarding spectrum (thankfully, not in the danger zone). </p> <p>I have the same criticisms of the show that everyone else has cited... the rapid-fire editing, high drama, sensationalism, insensitivity of the facilitators, and the often superficial bandaid clean-up. But altogether it helped me understand a bit better how people become hoarders and get stuck there. </p> <p>The other day I came across this insightful blog entry about ADD, clutter, hoarding, and being "chronically disorganized":</p> <p><a href="http://arianebenefit.com/blog/2011/10/19/truth-about-chronic-disorganization-understanding-what-causes-chronic-disorganization-and-how-to-heal-the-trauma-of-lifelong-disorganization-overwhelm-and-frustration/" rel="nofollow">http://arianebenefit.com/blog/2011/10/19/truth-about-chronic-disorganization-understanding-what-causes-chronic-disorganization-and-how-to-heal-the-trauma-of-lifelong-disorganization-overwhelm-and-frustration/</a> </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders/page/2#post-41206 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 19:21:36 +0000 chacha1 41206@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>about the deadlines ... as noted I only watched a few shows, but the ones that I saw all had imminent REAL deadlines re: city or county official action, generally to remove the person from the home. Not sure how the show's production schedule ran but it is possible they calendared their production to coincide with the deadlines - although that seems awfully cynical, even for TV.</p> <p>I am by no means an expert on the ways and means of U.S. government agencies but my impression is that it takes a looooooong time to reach a point of action and then there is no stopping it. I would actually not be surprised if some government deadlines have been *extended* to accommodate the production of the show(s). I'm pretty certain that was the case for at least one show I caught, about an older man, living in a true junkyard, whose obsession was stuck at the "value" of the junk, that he wanted to sell to benefit his grandkids.</p> <p>but per lucy ... what about christmas?! I have discovered I am a Christmas hoarder! Grinch that I am, I barely give anyone gifts, and yet I have a box of gift-wrappy stuff in my coat closet. I do believe I am going to put it out in the hallway with a FREE sticker on it. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders/page/2#post-41200 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 17:48:23 +0000 bandicoot 41200@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>lucy, i am sorry about your friend.<br /> what a thing to deal with, and how unfair of them to expect your home to be their solution.</p> <p>i haven't watched hoarders in a long time, but i was fascinated by it.<br /> i am fascinated by the other end of the spectrum too: buddhist monks living with only their robes, sandals, and a begging bowl.<br /> all these degrees of attachment and detachment, perceptions of scarcity and plenty.....very interesting to ponder.</p> <p>i did dislike the synthezised pressures and deadlines in the hoarders show.<br /> i prefer less hand-wringing and more " this is how we are solving this". </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders/page/2#post-41191 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 15:53:12 +0000 lucy1965 41191@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>Not wanting to derail this, but -- thank you, chacha. I took a lot of flack from people on another forum who only knew them on-line: they'd never been in their home, never smelled it, never walked on a thin layer of things through waist-high piles to get to the bathroom. As much as I loved my friend -- and I did love her -- I was married and had a child and they had the right not to have their lives disrupted.</p> <p>Okay, done now. Who wants to meet me in another thread and talk about Christmas? *weary grin* </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders/page/2#post-41183 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 12:43:14 +0000 chacha1 41183@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>It seems especially tragic when there is a mutually enabling couple at the heart of things. I've seen two basic subsets of Hoarders shows (and actually don't think I've watched at all since this discussion started): The older adult whose spouse has either died or left, and whose children are trying to save the hoarder from imminent eviction (or, in one case, jail time); and the couple whose children still live at home but are imminently being taken away by CPS.</p> <p>When it's a single, older person you can at least make the argument that they're not hurting anyone but themselves. When it's a couple with adolescents in the house, usually one adult goes into the show claiming the other person is the problem but very shortly it becomes clear that they are both equally complicit.</p> <p>And they blame EVERYONE but themselves - they NEVER voluntarily seek help.</p> <p>Sorry about your friend lucy1965. You were wise not to bring them into your home. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders#post-41177 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 11:39:39 +0000 lucy1965 41177@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>I can't bear to watch it. My former best friend and her husband were Level 4 hoarders when I knew them. Repair people refused to enter the apartment. When their landlady finally had enough (I found out after that they'd been making only partial rent payments for a year), they asked to move in with us; when I counteroffered -- help finding and securing a new place, moving, and starting the paperwork for disability payments for her husband -- I was cut off. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders#post-41176 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 11:36:06 +0000 shebolt 41176@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>I watch for several reasons:</p> <p>Pure train-wreck entertainment;<br /> To remind myself that I'm not that bad off;<br /> To remind myself that, under the right circumstances, I could end up like that;<br /> To inspire myself to get up and clean something. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders#post-41168 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 09:49:59 +0000 Rosa 41168@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>I only watch the show Hoarders with a friend who likes all those TLC shows. But in general I like all the hoarding media, including Hoarding, Buried Alive and the various movies about hoarders/collectors because I think the "real" hoarders' thought process/rationalizations give insights into why all of us accumulate so much.</p> <p>Also, I read a lot of COH blogs and memoirs, and the more analytical books about hoarders, and i think there is a lot of similarity between hoarding and addiction, in terms of how people parent and the process their kids go through. It's very affirming without leading me down the rabbit hole of "what exactly was going on with my parents?", because one of my parents is a confessed/treated/sober addict and the other still maintains he acted just like that before he ever started using, so reading about addicts &amp; alcoholics puts me mentally between them, not in a good position to learn much. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders#post-41167 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 09:37:06 +0000 writing all the time 41167@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p><a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29981109/" rel="nofollow">http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29981109/</a><br /> The above is a link to a documentary called 'My Mother's Garden'. It's the work of a film maker whose mother is a hoarder. Parts of it are hard to watch, so be forewarned.</p> <p>For me, it's more complete and more intimate. It might be available on Netflix. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders#post-41166 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 09:32:34 +0000 writing all the time 41166@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>I watch from time to time, to see how the mental health issues are dealt with. Like others, I can't watch every episode. If one of the professionals called in is being harsh or demanding, that episode gets turned off.</p> <p>I had the privilege of listening to a panel of folks involved in a Hoarder type show. The psychologist, the adult daughter of a woman who was featured, a previous 'hoarder', and a professional organizer. It was eye-opening for me, and I came away with a better understanding of what happens in the whole hoarding process. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders#post-41163 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 08:23:02 +0000 Parsifal 41163@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>One of my relatives was a hoarder - as bad as anything you've ever seen on TV, and worse. I want to understand how people turn out that way, and why. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/why-do-you-watch-hoarders#post-41161 Tue, 20 Dec 2011 05:40:29 +0000 squidy 41161@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>I can't lie. For me it's mostly just masturbatory.<br /> It does inspire me to clean and to get rid of stuff. (Because I form weird attachments to objects too..) But after I'm done cleaning, I keep watching. And I fantasize about more cleaning.</p> <p>I think this is because, for me, it's a bit personal. There's a family of hoarders (about an 8.5 out of 10 as they would be rated on the show..) that I let myself get a little tangled up with for a while, and I'm still not really over everything that happened. But at least I'm not fantasizing about throwing a certain member of that family off a cliff anymore.</p> <p>Not that I'm saying I'm animus or apathetic towards all hoarders. I do sympathise with the people on the show more often than not, and it's pretty heart-warming whenever the cleaning and therapy are successful.</p> <p>But I still experience a lot of less-than-savory thoughts and emotions while watching the show, and I get a sort of twisted satisfaction from it. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/hoarders#post-28134 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 20:35:07 +0000 momwalker1966 28134@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>I don't know if there is any hoarders as members here- and maybe working on that- I am still really new- but I do know one in real life and it breaks my heart to think of her living like she does daily. I have watched the show and have to admit that a few extra things get done afterwards, extra things thrown away, a little more scrubbing. Last time I went to see my hoarding friend though- I was sick for two days. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/hoarders#post-28130 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 19:52:56 +0000 Rosa 28130@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>Nina, are you thinking about Hoarding: Buried Alive? It seems like it goes slower, shows more therapy, and starts out with subjects who are in better shape than the A&amp;E Hoarders show. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/hoarders#post-28127 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 19:24:08 +0000 klutzgrrl 28127@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>I just saw a whole episode of this show. I've seen 'bits' before, but this was the first time I watched it through. I had a raft of issues with it; one particular time when a woman was hugging her old teddy and crying then gave it up - I'm thinking, THIS, this familiar source of comfort, should be the object you KEEP! Where is the discussion about what matters and what doesn't? Meanwhile the daughter was going on interminably about what a terrible mother she was. The part with the 'serial hobbyist' man was better - there seemed to be a bit more discussion and the girlfriend even recognized when he had a dummy-spit and just started tossing things with a 'fine, you've won!' attitude instead of processing it.</p> <p>I find it troubling that someone who introduces themselves as a doctor - (I'm assuming a doctorate in psychology or similar) - would do a far better job than these people are doing. There seems to be very little work done in terms of actually addressing issues. In another show (my weird obsessions? - it seems to be the season for being a voyeur to other people's problems) - the psych said, 'so what is the pain?' directly asking the person what was bothering them. The woman in the episode I watched would have benefitted from that, I think.</p> <p>She was leafing through a box of HAPPY memories from her old job. Being berated by her ungrateful children. I'm thinking, this woman has sacrificed her life for her family, got no love back, and they wonder why she is clinging to objects that remind her of happier days? She needs help to get her life back, not just to clean her house.</p> <p>*sigh* </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/hoarders#post-14176 Fri, 05 Nov 2010 10:16:04 +0000 mazzy88 14176@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>Yes, Nina, I can see how it would make you sad. The format is staged in my opinion because you can't change a person with a serious psychological problem in 3 days. Not only that, they glorify the horrible conditions of these houses - "Wow, look at how dirty this is! Wow, look at the dead cats and rat feces!" </p> <p>That's why I feel like cleaning afterwards. Just watching the show makes me feel dirty. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/hoarders#post-14115 Thu, 04 Nov 2010 04:42:34 +0000 Nina 14115@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>I only watched one episode and it didn't make me want to clean or tidy up - it just made me sad. Hording is a serious psychological problem and the way they make the show to me doesn't do it justice. </p> <p>I once saw another program that dealt with people hording - but it followed them over weeks and months and it had a therapist working with them all the time. They improved and I'm sure that improvement will last much longer then the fast flashy made for tv 'make-overs' they show on horders. </p> http://unclutterer.com/discuss/topic/hoarders#post-14018 Mon, 01 Nov 2010 11:22:46 +0000 mazzy88 14018@http://unclutterer.com/discuss/ <p>I watch the show, I do admit. But after seeing a couple of episodes, you really come to the conclusion that if it's not staged or scripted, then at least something is going on. In every episode, things mysteriously get placed on the truck for disposal without the owner's consetn, which results in the owner finding out and completely blowing up. Seems awfully coincidental that this same sequence happens on every episode.</p> <p>But one thing I do have to say about the show is that my house has never been cleaner!! I get so disgusted at other peoples pig pens that I get a maniacal urge to clean. </p>